I’m trying so hard to like Arthur and Gwen together. I am. I really am. I should, by all rights, love them together and be rooting for the whole fairytale of a hard-working little girl to become queen of Camelot, blah blah. I was raised on Disney movies, after all. So why isn’t this working for me?
This episode should have made me switch teams. There was epic pining! There were violins swelling! There were pretty dresses! Dashing princes! But still, nothing. And for one good reason: Arthur and Gwen suck together. No, they more than suck together. They are excruciatingly awful together, romantically. What they really need is two weeks of dating to just get it out of their systems so we could all get over pretending that whatever’s between them is “true love.”
I mean, far be it from me to quote the pixie Grunhilda (played by the utterly fantastic Miriam Margolyes, who was having entirely too much fun with her role) about this whole situation, but what is love, anyway? Here today and gone tomorrow. Respect, that’s what lasts. And if Arthur and Gwen respect each other, I certainly haven’t seen proof of it. Oh, they admire each other. They idealize each other like fourteen year old girls do staring at a poster of Justin Beiber and imagining he’ll take them to the Spring Fling. They like the idea of what the other could become, but that isn’t respect. They say platitudes and what they think the other wants to hear and continue to build up this utter fantasy that I, as a viewer, am supposed to care about and root for.
Well pardon my French, but fuck that noise.